Why grief exists

Why grief exists – some random thoughts and reflections from a conversation.

  • When we are grieving, we are processing loss, along with meaning, values, philosophy, and impact.
  • We restore our joy through experiencing our grief.

If we cannot meet our grief with our full attention, our attention everywhere else can be compromised and distracted… we become partially present. Grief is an oft-resisted invitation to feel fully the honor, the joy, and the loss of a relationship that has changed, and that has changed us, both in its presence and its passing.

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A different kind of silence

‘Yes, we were very close. We spoke often, and easily. I love him. It was sudden – we think a heart attack.’

Suddenly a silent weight drops down a deep, long, vertical tunnel with no apparent sides. It takes its time until it hits the floor of the echo chamber and an ageless pain radiates outward in concentric circles. Other times an old man’s boot thrashes against the inside of my cavernous chest, bruising the ribs and sending a heat, with sound, that carries on traveling, as if forever, back to a place in the future where an old man sits and remembers he has been waiting a long time for it to arrive.

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Waiting for the silence, wading into presence.

“Who do we become in the silence? Where does silence happen? Who else is ‘in there’?
What is silence to sound… and why does that matter?” (aka Musings of a musician)


Sound and Song

These days I recognize it as home, the silence. Does that sound like an unexpected thing to hear from a musician? For many years, singing and songwriting have been my heart-vehicles for facilitating some kind of personal journey into connection and healing.

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Grieve your future, find your hope.

Written for you who see only trouble when you think of Extinction Rebellion.
For those who are Extinction Rebellion.
And for those that, like me, have to take time to grieve.

As a Western consumerist culture, we are often asked to avoid our grief – this seems unfortunate, unhelpful and unhealthy. Today is about being with our grief, fear, and feelings of deep loss.*

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